I didn't post a blog yesterday because I was too upset. I've never had a good relationship with my mom. A good day is when we don't argue. Yesterday we had a clog in our pipes which turned out to be the cause of tree roots, but my mom yelled at me blaming me because I guessed there were other stuff in the pipes and she assumed it came from me because, well, it's always my fault. Normally I just let her yell and I go about my way but when I was in the garage I overheard her talking to my dad about me and I didn't catch everything she said, all I know is that she said some incredibly rude and hurtful things about me. Does she even understand that the things that come out of her mouth are hurtful? Does she get that even though I don't show my emotions it still pains me to the core? This isn't the first time either. When I was in my teens she used to call me "useless", "worthless" but still to this day the most hurtful thing she has ever called me is "stupid". By far that is the most painful thing ever said to me and it still makes me cry everytime I think about it.
Don't get me wrong my mom is not "abusive" she doesn't do this on a daily basis and I know she loves me but when she gets angry it just comes out. I dunno sometimes I feel like I should talk to her about it but for the most part I feel like it wouldn't help all that much.
Anyhoo here's my random video of the day and I included an extra since I didn't do yesterday...
1 comment:
my dad and i have that sort of relationship... he's said some things that can never be reversed and i act like i don't care but he used to be my best friend and now things have changed (because of my sexuality) and it seems like he doesn't like me anymore... thankfully i'll be out of the house by this time next year, so it won't be as bad... wanna be my roomie? lol
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